July 2011
“I acknowledge the advantages of monogamy,” Savage told me, “when it comes to...”
– Dan Savage on the Virtues of Infidelity - NYTimes.com
I feel about Dan Savage the same way I feel about Bill Maher — I think they’re both kind of dickish, and I agree with them both 99% of the time.
June 2011
Thought of some more songs
No brainers:
American Woman - NOT the Lenny Kravitz version
American Girl - Tom Petty
Real American - The motherfucking HULK HOGAN theme song
This isn’t so much a patriotic mix as it is a mix of songs that prominently feature the word “America” or “American” or “USA.”
“This movie is the apotheosis of a Woody Allen male fantasy, and I wish he would...”
– Sweetness and Light: Midnight in Paris is Terrible and I Will Judge You if You Enjoyed It
Oddly enough, I agree with everything Nat says in this (hilarious) review, yet I still liked the movie. Am I just that much of a Woody Allen fanboy?
“1. She is introduced butt-first, in a close-up shot of her nearly nude ass, as...”
– Let’s All Play, ‘How Is Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Hilariously Objectified in Transformers?’ — Vulture
Still on the fence about seeing this. I don’t know if this list makes me more or less likely to go.
Currently assembling a patriotic mix for the beach...
Here’s what I got so far:
America Fuck Yeah! - Team America World Police Soundtrack
America the Beautiful - Ray Charles
America - Neil Diamond
America - Simon & Garfunkel
Born in the USA - Bruce Springsteen
Back in America - Network (from the National Lampoon’s European Vacation soundtrack)
Pink Houses - John Mellencamp
Back in the USA - Edgar Winter (Chuck Berry cover)
...
“In late May, Big Freedia, the gender-bending “Sissy Bounce” rap performer from...”
– Pop-Up Clubs, in Secret Spaces, Party by Night - NYTimes.com
“Sissy Bounce”? There’s no way that’s a real thing.
“I’m so tired of places that are cool,” said Michael Nevin, The Journal’s lanky...”
– Pop-Up Clubs, in Secret Spaces, Party by Night - NYTimes.com
My god I wanna punch this guy.
“BY day, Jobee, an unassuming Taiwanese restaurant on Howard Street, just east of...”
– Pop-Up Clubs, in Secret Spaces, Party by Night - NYTimes.com
Haha… This entire article reads like something out of a Stefon sketch.
Who gives a fuck about an Oxford comma? →
You know who doesn’t give a fuck anymore? The University of Oxford styleguide:
As a general rule, do not use the serial/Oxford comma: so write ‘a, b and c’ not ‘a, b, and c’.
Bush-appointed judge upholds Obama health care law →
This appears to be a big deal:
Today’s ruling by a federal appeals court in Ohio, upholding the Obama health care law, marks the first time a Republican-appointed judge has found the most controversial part of the law constitutional.
“A woman’s right to go topless in New York has a long history. The...”
– Yes, Ladies, You Can Walk Around the City Topless - New York News - Runnin’ Scared
Huh… who knew?
“Camptown Races”, sometimes referred to as “Camptown Ladies”,...”
– Camptown Races - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
What!?! Why didn’t anyone ever tell me that this song was SUPER RACIST? We sang this in grade school music class.
“A spectacle of cosmic, brutal, heavy-metal homoeroticism.”
– A.O Scott’s review of the new Transformers movie is so hilarious and epic.
Surprisingly, in the midst of pointing out how ridiculous it is, Scott admits actually likes the movie a little bit. I may have to go see this now…
“Resuming his routine, Mr. Morgan warned his audience, “Don’t ever...”
– Tracy Morgan Smooths Over Homophobia Controversy By Joking About “Retarded Kids”
“Obama hasn’t been too bad to banks. He could have been worse,” said a top...”
– On Obama, Wall St. Shows a Reluctance to Commit - NYTimes.com
Yes, how dare Obama mildly criticize the people who DESTROYED OUR ECONOMY. The nerve of him! Doesn’t this president realize that bankers are very sensitive? Umm, hello, you’re hurting their feelings. Lay off. Why...
“At least the encephalitic Mr. Met is a friendly guy and is often accompanied by...”
– Cranston Pebbleworth: Why I Hate Baseball-headed Mascots
Agreed. It’s the black eyes. Terrifying.
Box Office Shocker: 'Midnight in Paris' Becomes... →
Huh… go fig. It was a good movie. Still not as good as Vicky Cristina Barcelona, though.
EDIT: I should add, I wasn’t saying I think VCB is his best film of the past 25 years. It’s probably his best of the past 10 years, though.
Looking back on his last 25 years, he’s actually had a lot of great movies: Crimes and Misdemeanors, Husbands and Wives, Manhattan Murder...
“One of the most striking aspects of the recent Republican Party Presidential...”
– Obama and Gay Marriage : The New Yorker
“Jamie Foxx will play the title role of Django, a freed slave who teams with a...”
– Tarantino unchains Django: It’s Foxx - Daily Variety
Sounds like Inglorious Basterds but with slaves instead of Jewish American soldiers.
Also, Broomhilda?
"Sumo Collins" Recipe - NYTimes.com →
This drink is SO LEGIT.
It’s just gin, lemon juice and simple syrup topped with seltzer and garnished with an orange slice. Really refreshing, though. I’m declaring it the Official Drink of Summer 2011.
WatchLate Night Eats: David Chang’s Instant Ramen Hangover Cure
Important information.
Best. Party crashers. Ever. →
Seriously. I would want all four of these people at my party.
“Stories involving felonies, attempted felonies, bodily fluids, the failure to...”
– Wedding toast tips: Don’t mention the coke-fueled orgies. - By Troy Patterson - Slate Magazine
Duly noted. Filing this article away for later…
“Vice President Joseph R. Biden Jr., an acknowledged fan of The Onion’s merciless...”
– For The Onion, Any Pulitzer Prize Will Do - NYTimes.com
NY Post: Vote for your favorite Weiner cover →
I’m voting for “OBAMA BEATS WEINER”.
“Camille smells like beef jerky. Goodnight.”
– Kelsey Grammer Gets Hacked, Sends Mass Email That His Ex-Wife ‘Smells Like Beef Jerky’ - Gawker
I mean, there are worse things you could accuse your ex-wife of smelling like, right? That’s almost complimentary. “She’s spicy, like delicious beef jerky!”
The Onion: Cleveland Pathetically Celebrates... →
I thought the exact same thing when I saw Cleveland fans cheering on the Mavs. So pathetic:
As the Dallas Mavericks sealed their NBA Finals victory over LeBron James and the Miami Heat Sunday night, the citizens of Cleveland participated in a joyous, exuberant, and extremely pathetic celebration of their city’s greatest-ever sports moment.
“When I saw there were just two minutes...
Dave Weigel: "The jerk store called..." - Tim... →
“Hugh Hefner’s wedding to Crystal Harris was called off after she secretly...”
– Hugh Hefner’s wedding to Crystal Harris called off — after she secretly planned to ditch him at the altar for a $500,000 media deal - NYPOST.com
Who could have guessed that the smoking hot 25-year-old was only marrying a guy old enough to be her great-grandfather for the money? This is...
“After fans meet him, he said, they often complain online that his looks didn’t...”
– A Voice Actor Shows His Face and Hits the Road: ‘Jon Benjamin Has a Van’ on Comedy Central
I guess the ladies are hoping he looks like Archer?
He actually looks a lot more like Bob from Bob’s Burgers than he does Archer.
Ben & Jerry’s May or May Not Be Making Schweddy... →
I don’t even like ice cream, but I would totally buy this.
A conversation I just had while watching the video...
ME: How did no one figure out til the late 90s that George Michael was gay? I mean, look at him! All that eye shadow…
CO-WORKER: Guys were a lot more ambidextrous in the 80s.
ME: [pause] I think you mean androgynous.
CO-WORKER: Oh yeah.
